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Running in circles, tethered to this year

December 26, 2012

This is December speeding by, almost sped. The most definitive of all months.

I will write more often next year, I say this every year end. This is how one avoids one’s fate, by postponing it. It has been a really mixed year, marked by failures and triumphs and angst. I know exactly the type of chocolates my life’s box is filled with, the bittersweet dark ones, and I seem to relish them the most. Some people don’t want to be content lest they become complacent, and I seem to be one of them.

I thought of doing this  again which I had done last to last year, and isn’t it a little bit depressing how some things don’t change even after two years? Stand still or at ease, you end up standing at the same spot.

I am telling you now, 2013 can’t come fast enough. Hope you have a great one!

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?

I studied, and am studying, western philosophy. Sometimes it feels like my brain is being  peeled and there won’t be any left. Mostly it feels like random cartoon lightbulbs are going on on top of my head.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

No. No.

3. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?

The ability to make the right career choice for myself. (When will this answer change?)

4. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

One extremely horrible date. A few funny-in-retrospect. They told me to try matrimonial sites and I did, and well, even if it has all been in vain, it at least makes for good stories. Someday, I may write a book titled ‘ How I never met my husband who I wasn’t looking for.’

5. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I learnt how to swim! Like a pro! Three strokes out of four done! Also, it’s like a booster, whenever I get underconfident about something, I say to myself, ‘Hey girl! It took you three years but finally you learnt how to swim! Give yourself three years and you can accomplish anything’.

6. What was your biggest failure?

I didn’t exercise at all.

7. Did you suffer illness or injury?

I can’t sleep well. At nights. Does that count?

8. What was the best thing you bought?

This book called ‘Nausea’. Sartre and I are in love.

9. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Mine. Fewer fights. Less guilt.

10. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

People, at times. They make too much unnecessary noise, don’t they?

11. Where did most of your money go?

Travelling. Worth every penny.

12. What did you get really excited about?

TV shows.  The possibilities of interesting conversations.

13. What song will always remind you of 2012?

I listened to a lot of jazz this year.

14. Compared to this time last year, are you:

– happier or sadder? I don’t know.
– thinner or fatter? Fatter.
– richer or poorer? Richer.

15. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Yoga. Writing.

16. What do you wish you’d done less of?


17. Did you fall in love in 2012?


18. What were your favorite TV programs?

Girls. Mad Men. Breaking Bad. Homeland. 30 Rock. The Big Bang Theory.

19. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

I don’t hate anyone any year.. 

20. What was the best book you read?

The doors of perception. The age of reason. Nausea. Cat’s cradle.

21. What was your greatest musical discovery?

A lot of jazz artists.

22. What did you want and get?

Library membership.

23. What did you want and not get?

Can’t think of anything.

24. What was your favorite film of this year?

I didn’t watch movies this year!

25. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 30, was quite depressed. Went on a holiday, spent a lot of time with family and friends, nothing helped. I still weep for my youth sometimes.

26. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

If I enjoyed my job.

27. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?

A lot of leggings with dress shirts. Not caring a shit if my trousers are too snuggy at my ass.

28. What kept you sane?


29. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

The character of ‘Peggy Olson’ on ‘Mad men’.

30. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.

Let go.

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